Breakaway

I would like to say something shocking. I am getting tired of only writing about spirituality. There, I said it. Hate me if you will. I am getting tired of spirituality altogether, if I can be so bold as to admit it. The whole thing is making me sick. I am so drawn to it and obsessed by it, and yet, right now I'm frustrated with the limitations it poses. Maybe I need a break. I have broached the subject here before and now I think there will be a shift. I'm not saying that I will never write about spirituality; it will still come up quite often. I just think that I will be including much more. I like to consider myself a well-rounded individual, after all ;)

Now, I have several spiritual things to write about but I'm not really in the mood. Let me sum them up briefly: Spoke more to Fellow #5 about anger at and disbelief in God. Went to temple with Veteran Seeker, the rabbi was so unenthused that it was comical, had an excellent discussion afterwards about how I became a Seeker and on the nature of evil in the world. Had a discussion with Skeptic about what I have recently written here, specifically about being angry at God. Skeptic seemed mildly amused by this recent turn. He is great to talk to about these things, has such interesting views.

So... recent news...

1. I got a scholarship. Very happy. I have been waiting on that decision for months and I finally got the letter in the mail. Fellow Seeker was on the phone at the time and did the drumroll for me as I opened it. This one, combined with my other one, covers half of my tuition this year. Woohoo :)

2. I proudly shoved my magazine into Mother's face so that she could read my poem. She oohed and aahed over my name on the staff list but as she read the poem she muttered, "Oh... What is this? What did you write? Oh..." The reception wasn't good. She completely missed the point. She said the poem seems to be saying that it sucks to be a woman. I said, "No, it's about the way the Adam and Eve story portrays women, and how troubling that is." I was really disappointed because my mother is one of the few people who really gets me. Just completely understands me through and through. But I guess that can't extend to all things. I asked her, "So, you don't like it?" and she managed, "I like that it rhymes."

3. Boyfriend met the family today. He came with me to visit Father, which was good because I have lost the will to go on my own. After that, he came over to my house for a barbecue with my wacky family. Seriously, they're cracked, but in a mildly entertaining way.

Note: Boyfriend wants a more interesting nickname, but I am not taking any of the suggestions he has posed thus far. If it were up to me, I would start calling him Il Migliore, but that might give him a big head :)

4. I have to attend an important dinner this week with all the fellows, their bosses, the program people, etc. We are going to a classical music concert afterwards, and the director of the program asked me to prepare a 3-4 minute speech on the history of the concert hall. She said that they chose me to do it because of my "musical background and conscientious research skills." I have been scratching my head for a while, trying to figure out where they got the idea that I have a musical background. I mean, I played piano in second grade but quit. Tried my hand at guitar at 13 but quit. Sang in various shows and groups during high school but... You get the idea. Musical? *Snorts* I suspect that they wrote this e-mail to another fellow who turned it down first :P I'm flattered, obviously, but I don't like public speaking and this is a big event.