I live in a crazy ass house. Seriously, folks. I think I have been laughing nonstop for two days.
*My family is not Catholic. Our parents used to be, but us kids don't know the first thing about it. Sister's Boyfriend is Catholic. Today he was telling us that his mother wants him to go to church with her on Wednesday because it's Ash Wednesday. He said he wasn't sure he was going to get his ashes, and Sister exclaimed, with all sincerity, "Why would you? You're not Jewish." I nearly fell off the couch.
*My cat is a little pervert, and he has the hots for me. My family recently discovered that he has a bra fetish. If I leave one lying around in my room in the basement, he drags it up to the first floor in between his teeth. If one is on the first floor in a pile of laundry or something, he drags it up to the second floor. We thought he was just into bras, regardless of who they belong to, but we conducted an experiment the other day. Mother wanted to see what he would do with a pile of bras. Would he start convulsing? Jump out the window? She put a large heap on the living room floor (none were mine) and he sniffed them each and walked away. Later that day he dragged one of mine up again. What the hell?
*Kid Sister #1 has a major crush on Sister's Boyfriend. This is fairly new, but is quickly developing into something that alarms the rest of us. She keeps saying that when she gets bigger, she will be his girlfriend. During a car ride, she calmly stated that she was going to throw Sister out onto the expressway.