I have become mildly obsessed with this genealogy research. Found out that the library holds subscriptions to those expensive sites I can't afford; all I have to do is go there and take advantage. Constructed my family tree yesterday and harassed my mother for information. She doesn't have all that much, but my grandmothers do. Making some calls this weekend :)


Yesterday Artsy Friend came over and we had coffee and talked for a few hours. It was fun. I hadn't yet "hosted" in my own apartment before, unless you count Boyfriend's friends coming over to watch the game.

Finished some of this week's deadlines which has alleviated some of the pressure. Some.

Day 17

Desperate times call for desperate measures. I replaced my beloved half and half this morning with skim milk. My coffee tastes like shit. On Tuesday I start aerobics class. Yay!

In other news, I started researching my genealogy. This is something I have ALWAYS wanted to do but thought it was too expensive and hard. I found a free site, RootsWeb.com, and I'm sure there are others. This is really exciting to me.

After I get into work a tad late due to a doctor's appointment...

"So how did that, um, brain transplant go this morning?"

It's nice to know that I have such a sensitive employer.

I got a seemingly stable freelance writing gig that I am jazzed about. I'm meeting with the guy on Thursday to discuss the future, but I already did a piece for his company and he is very happy with it. I never do PR work for companies that are in the same industry as mine because that would be a conflict of interest and just wrong. (Plus, I'm sure that I have somewhere signed something saying I wouldn't, though I couldn't point you to it.) But this is a retail company that sells things that are practically from another planet as my company's products, so I worry not.

I had a fun weekend. Saturday night Boyfriend and I tried to revive our Sunday night ritual by buying and cooking some delicacies, pouring some wine, and watching the first two episodes of Rome. First we had Sopranos, then the Tudors, but now we've got nothing, so we tried it. Not bad; I think we both got into it, although I have to turn away every five seconds because I can't stand gore.

Yesterday we went shopping. All day we were at the mall, and I came home with a ton of cheap, gorgeous stuff. I was/am very happy. Just to give you an idea... I bought two pretty dresses that fit me perfectly for the combined total of $21. Today I wore a new outfit to work and a colleague whistled when I got out of my car. Things are looking up for the not-cute intern.

For those of you concerned about energy expenditure, use Blackle instead of Google. Same search engine, more green.

(I think it's sexy looking, too.)

Day 12

So I read the calorie guidelines more carefully, and I am supposed to be burning 500-750 more calories than I take in each day, not 300 like I had been doing. Yesterday I got it up to 500 because of a long, one hour walk we took. Guess that will be the minimum goal from now on. 500 calories per day equals loss of 1 pound a week, as 1 pound of fat equals 3500 calories.

I have begun using a calorie counting tool online and it is working really well for me. In the last two days I managed to burn around 300 more calories than I consumed. If I can just do that every day it will slowly and surely come off.

I have arranged for a Saturday night hangout with Artsy Friend, which I am pretty jazzed about. I watch Sex and the City episodes and I get bummed about not being surrounded by estrogen. I'm used to that, you know, in my family. I have two awesome female friends in town that I have to start making plans with more often. So Saturday! Girls night out! Frozen margaritas baby!

So I keep telling myself, Okay, I'm going to focus on banging out my classes and stop taking on freelance writing jobs. But I can't stick to it. It's not just that I'm incapable of saying 'no,' but I am incapable of not going out and searching the boards and soliciting people to hire me. It's just too tempting. I mean, if I see that someone will pay me $50 for an article it will take me a half hour to write it... damn it, I'm going to do it. And gigs like that are few and far between, which means I work my tail off to get and keep them. I try to tell myself I will take it out of my 'leisure time' but I don't think I have any of that anymore!

I just came across my japa beads in the side pocket of my purse while looking for a scrunchie, and came to the sad realization that I don't meditate anymore. Not "once in a while," but never. The last time I meditated was on the way home from the airport in NY because I was really stressed out and wanted to kill someone.

Goal: to meditate every night

This morning I met with the COO and they are having me do a whole bunch of work on the marketing plan for our company's new product. I suppose they are going to really make me work for this new salary. I don't care; I feel important! And consequently, happy.

I have decided to go to the mall this weekend and buy some fabulous new clothes. I detest clothes shopping and tend to dress like a hobo in order to avoid it, but I am still on my work high and want to be a stud.

Gosh I wish the Traveler was in town to go with me! :) She should have one of those shows where you make people over, I swear.

I really want to buy a dress. I don't think I own a dress. Not a fancy one, but something to wear to work and out for drinks with friends. Something like this maybe?

Day 8

Today at work I noticed in the ladies' room mirror that I looked slimmer. It could have been my imagination but that was the distinct impression that I got, and it made me feel good all day. Then for dinner I had a bad-ass burger and fries.

I'm not sorry.

I have had a rough ass week. They gave me an injection for my strep throat which led to my left leg being numb for several days. (When does that happen??) They hit a nerve or something; incompetent bastards. I am hoping it will go away because I can't do another minute in that hell-hole, I mean, emergency room.

I am back at work today. Nearly finished with antibiotics but they make me nauseous and there's the, uh, numb leg thing, so I was kinda worried about coming back. But I feel good having work to do and being at my desk with my coffee (not my healthy latte, but my coffee). I hope that will last throughout the day.

What else, what else... not much actually. I lined up some freelance gigs, which is good, but have to balance them with finishing my damn classes, which is not so good. Some good news, though, is that someone at my school is lobbying with the dean for me to get me internship credit for writing this damn book. If it works out, that will take care of the last class I need and I can finally graduate!!

I have the best boyfriend in the world. He cleared his pretty full, pretty important schedule today to stay home with me.

:)

I am doing okay. This is not the most pleasant thing, obviously, but whatever. I got some movies from the library yesterday and have a ton of deadlines today, so I am all set up with stuff to do. I also have Butterfinger hot chocolate. You know, for my throat....

I have strep throat. I had to go to the hospital yet again (darn doctors who don't take walk-ins), but this time, I got a very painful injection that made me want to throw up all over the emergency room and then eventually displace another patient from her room so I could lie down. Yeah.

Day 3

Yesterday my skort was loose around my waist, which was a happy occurence. Last night, however, Boyfriend and I had dinner at CF and... it was bad.

Today will be better!

Breakfast:
Sojourness's Cafe Latte - Glass of skim milk, dash of coffee, 2 Splenda's
Whole wheat bagel with butter spread, peach and raspberries

*Note: Bad sleeping-with-air-conditioner-on sore throat! Punishment from the gods!

Have to share this because I love it

Day 2

I didn't exercise yesterday the way I wanted to. I know it sounds like a lame excuse, but life gets in the way. It's hard. If it were easy everyone would be in shape.

I am determined to today. I reserved a DVD at the library called "Dance it off!" or some other inane title. Dancing is fun. It's gotta be fun or I won't do it. Consequently, Boyfriend and I are going to start playing sports together - tennis, swimming, whatever.

I ate well yesterday though. Very well, I'd say.

This afternoon, Boss gave me a vase full of flowers and a hefty Cheesecake Factory gift card, with a greeting card that read, "Thank you so much for doing a fabulous job on the book. You are just completely awesome!"

:)

Fitness diary

Day 1 of the rest of my life, not being lived as a blob.

Date: 8/13/2007
Weight: X lbs.
Projected exercise: Jumping rope and walking around the track

Update

• I did not write my essay, but I did outline it and get that approved by the professor so I can write it this week.
• I did revise my review.
• I did not write my article.
• I did drink wine :)
• I did watch a movie - Bee Season on HBO on Demand. Interesting but a bit disappointing.
• I did not go swimming.
• I did go out to dinner! Boyfriend took me out in celebration of an important writer's milestone I have crossed. We went to an Italian restaurant where I had a peach Bellini and we ate bruschetta and shrimp scampi and Italian cream cake. Mmmmmmm.
• I did exercise - Boyfriend and I went walking, uphill and along the track, at a local park.
• I did forget those fucks. I'm done trying.

I also...

• Finished two books.
• Bought some sorely needed picture frames and other home-y materials.
• Relaxed :)

Good weekend.

Things I want to accomplish this weekend:

• Write essay
• Revise review
• Write article
• Drink wine
• Watch a movie
• Go swimming
• Go out to dinner
• Exercise (most likely in the form of Dance Dance Revolution)
• Forget the fact that my book clubbers have deserted me for the last time, dammit

How much of that will actually happen remains to be seen, but it's good to have goals.

I made Indian food for the first time last night! It was very exciting. I had never done it before because the recipes are so complicated - you've gotta have turmeric, cumin, and all this other stuff. I didn't realize that if you just buy "Curry Powder," it's got all of that stuff in it already. I made chicken curry with onions, and garlic naan (not from scratch, are you crazy?). I also made a soup that didn't turn out well. For dessert, I made bread pudding using Boyfriend's mother's recipe; she taught me how to make it during the visit since it is his favorite. I felt very domestic and proud of myself. A rare occurence. Don't get too excited.

I just want to take a moment to say that I love Cinnamon Raisin Bagel Chips.

I am going to go back on Weight Watchers. A friend of mine is on it and is helping me reorient myself, since it has been... oh... six years since I last did it. I am also joining an aerobics class for the month of September - yay!

New company lounge nearly done. Found out today we're getting a pool table. Crazy, huh? I will be too afraid to use it, thinking my boss will think I'm slacking off. (Which is what I would be doing, but why else have a pool table at work?) I remember playing a hospital game on the computer - this was before the Sims revolution - and you created and furnished your hospital, and when you put a pool table in the employee lounge, no one did any work. People were dropping dead because doctors and nurses were shooting pool. Think I should mention that to my boss? Ha ha.

P.S. Second Bridget Jones movie was fab as well. My new favorite quote: "I refuse to work with someone who believes that Iran is the name of David Bowie's wife."

Okay, I accidentally left my Dilbert desk calendar/planner at home today, which means I feel like I am missing a limb.

Yesterday was a company-sponsored beach party that Boyfriend and I went to. The area was beautiful - on a large lake - but it was a waterpark and more geared towards colleagues with children. We stayed a few hours, had lunch, got our caricatures done (yesss!) and then went home to relax.

I'm covered in mosquito bites and can't stop scratching. Help!!

We have our monthly meeting this morning but no one is really here, not even the big boss. Free donut minus sitting through an hour of meeting = great way to start a Monday!

How did I get TLC's "What About Your Friends?" stuck in my head? I mean, that's not even CrazySexyCool... that's the older album I had on cassette. Not exactly classic, and I have no idea how it popped in.

I am working on a project that, while important, is boring as all hell. It is one of those tedious things that doesn't require much thought so I wish I could listen to music while doing it, but my comp's sound doesn't really work and I don't have headphones anyway. Madonna.

Boyfriend is back tomorrow night; thank Goddess, I swear. I'm not letting him out of my sight for the rest of the year.

There is a bad smell in this building and they say it is probably because a raccoon came in and died. Yummy.

Speaking of wildlife, I saw deer on the way to work this morning. Two men, with the antlers, and a woman. Gorgeous.

Went to the therapist last night ("I'll take 'The Rapists' for $200, Alex" ... God, I miss that show when it was good) and felt better. I had been having a rough few days. Not feeling too bad today; hopefully it will last ;) Also spoke to the Traveler on the phone last night, which always makes me smile. She had some interesting jelly bean stories to share.

I know that the new apartment is officially 'home' because I banged my leg on our bed the other night and have a huge, nasty bruise and cut, which is something I always did in the other apartment. I've christened it.

This is interesting. I had been following the whole stolen Italian art thing way back and hadn't heard about it since then.

[Pressing Things] To Do:

Unpack

Write paper on Henry IV

I was feeling shitty the other day because Dev Guy referred to me as an intern once again, and I thought, "I have been here almost a year. My anniversary is coming up. I'm not an intern anymore!" And then I got down because I am stuck in a Catch-22: I work full-time to pay the bills, which makes it hard for me to finish my degree, which prevents me from making more money. But now that the CEO's book is written and will be on Amazon in a matter of weeks, I feel very proud of what I have accomplished. I never did anything like that before and I'm glad that I have that credential next to my name. So screw it. I'm doing what I can, and I'm happy.

What kind of world are we living in when you can't trust your Lean Pocket in the office freezer?

Last night I watched Bridget Jones's Diary and cried when Boyfriend texted me that he was in Central Park and wished I was there. I don't even like chick flicks but this was a good movie. Thoroughly enjoyed it. Checking the sequel out of the library so I can be disappointed :)

My mother called me as well since she hadn't heard from me since my return. She brought up the weight thing again, being helpful with a suggestion she had gotten from someone, somewhere. I was glad she called, though, because I was lonely in that smelly apartment. I don't like being a bachelorette for a week. I will like it more Friday night at the movies with Artsy Friend, but not till then.

You know, I have totally revamped my eating habits in the last months. If you look in my refrigerator you will find fruits and vegetables. My freezer has diet meals and frozen vegetables, skinless chicken breasts and low-cal waffles. I have sugar-free cookies, which I do not eat too many of, and pretzels and tea and the like. Exercise is key, because I haven't been doing any, and the lack of it has apparently walloped me good.